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A
humorous online book. |
 Hell
(and what to expect). Maybe it's due to lack of phone, postal, or Internet
service... or perhaps they're just having so much fun and don't care to keep
in touch! But that's doubtful unless they truly love the heat. Some say "you'll burn in Hell"
but does this mean your skin will be peeling for all eternity like a day in
the tropics without your sun block? Whatever Hell is, we do know it will be
hellish (goes with the territory), and we can pretty much count on it being
eternal (which seems like a very long time). |
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Constant sinus headaches Bloating (with gas) Heat Devils (and other creepy stuff) Cheap diner food Lousy waiter service More heat Psoriasis Relentless diarrhea Night sweats Overcrowded housing A lot more heat Serious heartburn Dry heaves Rashes (probably from heat) Scabies Everything a la carte |
Bad hair days (every day) Sweaty palms (from the heat) No free refills Yakking, pesky neighbors Severe abdominal pain Rude, inconsiderate people Hot dogs on a stick Tax on everything No vacation time A lot of people complaining (primarily about the heat) Bunions Nose pickers Mucus Canceled flights out Extremely hot heat Boils, warts, severe acne |
Ear wax Vermin (and related) TV Guide recipes Hot pockets Relentless heat No clocks Reruns (every season) Crabs (human and otherwise) Tuna helper Calendars that never change Locusts and other pests No change in the weather Unclean bed sheets Spiders and related Weasels (human type) Inept civil servants Nothing new (ever) |
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If you take the 'self-serve' approach to earth departure, heaven may be out of the question (in most religions), so you may want to hold off on 'taking the leap' and see Heaven (and what to expect) 
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